Monday 17 August 2009

Fantasy Pub Week! 1: Where and What

I’m calling this Fantasy Pub Week here at Pencil&Spoon. I’ve been playing around with this idea for a month or two and now it’s coming out of the box. It leads on from Friday’s If you had to… about your fantasy beer festival line-up; this just takes it a few steps further.

I’ll post each morning with a new thing to think about each day – Where and What, Draught Beer, Bottled Beer/Others, The People and Entertainment/Extras. It’s total fantasy stuff made just for you. Forget practicalities, forget that it really should make money if it needs to survive, forget any financial limitations; the only limitations are of your imagination. And if it troubles you then you have teleporters to travel to and from the pub whenever you like. How does that sound?

The first thing is: Where is it? and What is it like? Location, location, location. Where's your dream location for a pub? In the city, in your garden, on the moon, on the beach, overlooking Lords, in a fictional city… anywhere. And what's the view like? What can you see? And then what does it look like inside. Do you want sofas or benches, a large bar or small one...?

I usually put my answers in the comments section but I’ll put them up in the bulk of the post this week… For me I want it on the beach - a warm beach, white sand and crystal blue sea. The only provision is that I have complete climate control so that I can turn the temperature way down and turn on a big, open fire in the winter – nothing beats a strong stout in front of a crackling fire in winter. The pub itself would be open fronted in summer and leading straight onto the beach with an amazing sunset. It has a wooden floor and a horse-shoe bar in the middle. The tables are casual and wooden and graffitied with different-coloured marker pens. There will be old movie posters and pump clips on the white walls.In the winter the front closes up and the fire roars in the back with big, comfy sofas.

Where is your Fantasy Pub and What does it look like?

16 comments:

  1. Mine is already sort of there - id have it where the wasdale head inn is in wasdale, lake district, it's minutes from the foot of some of englands highest peaks, the valley is simply stunning. It already has a brewery so that would stay, id bring in some different beers, tart up the beer garden a bit to make the most of the views...i think id put some nice big chunky wooden benches and tables out there.

    the interior would stay pretty much the same, nice only benches, climing and walking gear hung on the walls, id sort the food out as its pretty terrible at the moment, other than that its about perfect.

    Id also have a little veg garden and big greenhouse to grow as much of the veg for the pub as i could.

    Dogs, muddy boots, wet walkers all welcome!

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  2. Mine would not be at the top of some remote Lakeland Valley. Despite being in a very beautiful location with great outdoor opportunity at the door step, it is difficult to get the place right for oh so many reasons. Getting decent kitchen staff for a start and so make the food good is not easy. Coping with the fact that when the sun shines you get mobbed but when it rains there is nearly nobody makes it hard to achieve a sustainable business.

    I'd have one in the suburbs of an affluent city where foot fall is far more sustainable and muddy walkers, kids and dogs don't wreak any effort to make the place nice. City places also demand less investment in outdoor furniture that only gets used on the occasional days that it doesn't rain, the rest of the time the rain rotting the wood so fast that the sales of beer doesn't justify replacements.

    Apart from that Moggy, I agree with everything you say.

    Rumour; Great Gable Brewery might move soon, but might not.

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  3. I'd go for a brew pub with the brewery on show, tanks behind the bar serving only my beers except for a selection of world beer styles in fridges. I'd have a town centre location West street is nice at the moment in Sheffield; I’d have it quite big with some comfy settees, plenty of standing room and some dinning space. Food would be simple, home made and seasonal.

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  4. Moggy, nice but don't worry about the beer and food, that comes later in the week!!

    Dave, it doesn't need to make money, it's pure, selfish fantasy to just plonk your ideal drinking spot anywhere in the world!!

    Stu, that sounds great, I wish I had something like that near me! But like I said to Moggy, food and beer come later in the week... stay tuned!

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  5. I like space where I can make a din too.

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  6. Has to have plenty of seating with large windows nearby. No matter where it is, it needs a good view of the passing parade. The location, therefore, is somewhere with plenty of passing foot traffic - the broader the demographic, the better. Cosmopolitan, Bohemian, hobos and bums, bogans and beautiful people - the whole lot. Walking past - not necessarily walking in! If it's in England then it must have plenty of 'Chavs' - whatever they are ... heard it on a doco the other night. Whoever the crowd is, they would surely get more interesting and funnier to watch with each beer.

    Cheers
    Prof. Pilsner

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  7. ahh yes i see post number 2 now!

    Dave, point taken, i shal remember that next time i visit ;o)

    ill be calling in @ your place when work calms down and i get out for another trip in the hills!

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  8. ahh yes i see post number 2 now!

    Dave, point taken, i shal remember that next time i visit ;o)

    ill be calling in @ your place when work calms down and i get out for another trip in the hills!

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  9. Okay, long essay coming up. I'd locate my pub on the outskirts of a reasonably sized town with plenty of cultural amenities (bookshops, decent arts cinema, etc.). Possibly in a quiet side street. Handy for public transport (bus and rail). Perhaps the pub has been converted from old terraced housing or is on the corner of a street. An intriguing, beautifully painted, pub sign hangs outside.

    Definitely agree with wooden flooring, slightly worn and characterful. Two bars, one with
    traditional pub benches and tables, one with (yes) comfy sofas (leather and scuffed?). A U-shaped bar of sufficient length that it doesn't become too crowded even at the busiest of sessions serves both areas. A beer fridge behind the bar (but clearly visible to customers) displays an enticing collection of interesting bottled beers. The windows of the pub are large enough to provide customers with views of what's happening in the world outside, but not large enough to make them feel that they're in a goldfish bowl. At night, light should spill cheerfully onto the pavement outside, luring passers-by in for a pint.

    The ceilings of both bars are decorated with pumpclips of beers that have been served (and there's a chalkboard showing beers currently on). There are, of course, open fires (coal or wood-fired) to ward off the chill on the coldest winter night, but patio-style doors that open onto a beer garden for more clement days. At all times of year, a pub cat (or dog, if you prefer) prowls the tables mugging customers for affection and food. Tables are candlelit at night.

    For when the weather's fine, a suitably large beer garden with plenty of seating (benches and tables and chairs). Landscaped, but not too fussily. Trees provide shade, or shelter from the odd passing shower. There's, of course, a nice view over fields into the hazy distance.

    Hmm, that's my relatively realistic fantasy, pinching a few features from hostelries I have known and loved. In short, the kind of pub where you can come to be sociable or just read over a quiet pint. Other, crazier, options are probably available too.

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  10. Prof. P, passers-by are great to watch, I'm with you there - I'm a people watcher!! You definitely don't want any chavs coming in the pub though, trust me!

    AndrewS, that sounds remarkably real and familiar... it must exist somewhere?! And if it did exist then I'd go there in a shot.

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  11. Mine would be out on the Road to the Isles in the Highlands, a traditional old style coaching inn so there would be a few rooms. The bar itself would be lots of dark wood, live fire, that kind of stuff.

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  12. A pub in the Highlands with decent beer? We really are in fantasy land there! ;)

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  13. Here are my thoughts on my ideal pub (admittedly 9 years old).

    I would say ideally it should be in a market town, in a location reasonably close to the town centre, but still permitting its own car park.

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  14. Oh, and, as it says in the article, "Provision made for both smokers and non-smokers that matches the demand". Not much chance of that nowadays :-(

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  15. Mark. Let's just say that my fantasy pub shares, ahem, certain elements with the Cambridge Blue, in, er, Cambridge. A bit of a cheat, I know, but the Blue is up there with The Bull in my favourite pubs of all time list.

    My thoughts on parts two and three of FPW to follow!

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  16. Curmudgeon, that pretty much covers everything! And it's your fantasy, if you want to smoke then smoke away!

    Andrew, I've never been to Cambridge but now it seems like there's a reason to go...

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